When I was a kid, my mom’s unspoken mantra at the dinner table was “take it or leave it.”

She wouldn’t tolerate picky behavior for a second. We ate what we were served, or we were out of luck.

If you are a parent of a child older than 9 months, chances are you know what I’m talking about when I say: there is nearly nothing more hair-pullingly frustrating than spending an hour making food, only to have that child(ren) throw a fit/refuse to eat/whine about said food.

One of the funny things I’ve experienced over the years as a plant-based mama, is people assume that my kids aren’t picky. (Don’t I wish.) Though my kids have grown up eating less processed food than the average American kid & they obviously eat more plants than most, they aren’t perfect eaters, & they aren’t without their picky moments.

With each child that has joined our family, things have grown even more complicated.

Each child has a list of foods they love & foods they hate. And trying to tailor my meals to please all taste buds at every meal, is akin to juggling 12 plates while simultaneously rollerblading around the kitchen. It’s impossible.

One child likes fresh tomatoes but won’t eat cooked (ie. diced canned tomatoes, like in a soup). Another loathes fresh tomatoes but will eat them cooked in a soup.

One child hates any type of sauce on pasta while the rest of them don’t care (& they all dislike any type of macaroni & cheese, vegan or not–I’ve tried them all & have finally given up on this one).

Two kids hate bananas, three kids love them (but I can sneak them into smoothies if I make sure the banana flavor isn’t too strong). One kid won’t eat watermelon while one kid could only eat only watermelon if we let him.

All the kids love Earth Balance (vegan butter), except one child who will only eat rolls, toast, pancakes, muffins, un-buttered.

All the kids will eat oatmeal, but three of the kids will only eat it if it’s cooked a certain way–boiling water poured over old-fashioned oats just enough to cover, let sit for 10 minutes for the oats to absorb the water (gotta thank Joseph for this technique).

Three of the kids LOVE, love guacamole & avocados, while the other two won’t touch anything that *might* even have a smidgen in it.

My boys love soy milk & won’t touch any other kind of non-dairy milk. My girls like both almond & coconut milks. (Though in smoothies or recipes, they can’t tell, so I use whatever I want! Hehe.)

I could go on but I won’t. You get the point.

Trying to create these lists in my head & keep it all straight is enough to make any sane women question her wits.

And I haven’t even included Joseph’s list of “won’t eats” which happily, has grown shorter & shorter over the years–namely seaweed, mushrooms, all seafood (pretty easy to please him with this one!) & anything “too gourmet” (chipotle rosemary cream cheese & spinach vegan tamales, for example).

So with this in mind, here are a few practical tips for keeping yer wits about you whilst getting your domestic goddess on in the kitchen AND doing your best to please all palates (or at least minimize tantrum throwing at the dinner table).

 

6 tips for feeding picky plantbased kids

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1. Focus on what they will eat.

I get depressed if I think of all the foods my kids won’t eat. But there are lots of (good) foods that my kids will eat.

Some of the foods all of my kids love*:

Cucumbers, carrot sticks, steamed broccoli, hummus, berries of any kind, applesauce, apple slices, frozen fruit (especially frozen peaches), fresh peaches, fresh & canned pineapple, fresh & canned mandarin oranges, oranges.

Tofu (especially w/ a sauce or in a stir-fry), rice (we totally love rice in our house & aren’t afraid of a little arsenic), whole grain bread, yogurt, PB&J (though some of my kids like it with just PB), oatmeal with a little brown sugar & non-dairy milk, crepes, pancakes.

Morningstar veggie sausage, Tofurky Italian sausage & hotdogs, Boca burgers,  lentil soup (like this or this one), Mexican rice, Cuban black beans (I share the recipe in my Simple e-cookbook), pretty much any dessert I make (check out my dessert recipes, here).

Cold cereal (Barbara’s Bakery, Nature’s Path granola, Rice Krispies, Corn Flakes, Cheerios, & Life cereal are some of their faves).

Popcorn with Earth Balance, raw almonds, banana bread, Joseph’s homemade veggie enchiladas made with handmade flour tortillas (truly spectacular), tacos, tostadas, soup (like this 15 minute one) with bread, veggie pizza (green peppers, olives, tomatoes, & pineapple are their fave toppings), green lemonade.

Nutritional yeast on spaghetti, mashed potatoes, baked potatoes, baked french fries, hash browns, muffins (like these or these), miso soup, baked beans & cornbread.

Of course the list goes on but you get the idea. As picky as my kids can seem at times (What, you don’t love mushrooms?!!), THERE ARE PLENTY OF GOOD FOODS THEY DO LOVE.

*My kids are plant-based/vegetarian. Though they eat mostly vegan at home because I’m vegan & I do most of the cooking, they do eat some dairy foods such as cheese, yogurt or eggs when the are away from home (at parties, friend’s house, school).

 

2. Use compartmentalized plates.

Most kids don’t like their foods mixed or touching. Which is why kids love compartmentalized dishes like these ones or these ones made 100% from recycled milk containers (affiliate links).

Putting each food into a separate compartment helps kids feel better about what they’re eating. We have several different kinds of compartment plates–one with 3 sections, one with 4, & another with 5.

The kids love eating from these plates & honestly, honestly, it makes serving food for a small army, a whole lot more manageable (to make things easier, I put all the plates on the counter, serve their food, then every one gets their plate to take to the table–cafeteria style).

 

3. Serve rolls, bread, or whole grain chips with soups or salads.

I’m pretty sure every kid loves bread & tortilla chips, I know all of my kids do. We can get them to eat pretty much any soup if they have bread or tortilla chips to go with it. We will often give the kids half a piece of naan bread (Indian bread) with lentil soup, for example, & say, “You can have the other half once you eat half your soup.” My kids will enthusiastically gobble up soup if they know they can have more bread as a result.

Most of our meals come with a side of bread in the form of a roll or toast, tortillas, crackers, croutons, or tortilla chips. It helps to stretch the meal a bit & makes eating soup or salad more enticing.

 

4. Don’t make separate meals for each child.

I’m not a short order cook & neither are you.

I try to strike a balance between being accommodating yet firm. Not every meal is going to be a smash with all five of my kids (unless we had pizza for every meal), but I do try to make a good effort in terms of making foods I know my kids not only like, but will gobble up. Even if these does mean that what we eat tends to have a lot of repetition & routine to it (if ain’t broke, don’t fix it!).

 

5. Have plan, a meal plan.

A few years back, Joseph & I realized we needed some sort of system for meal planning. I wasn’t thrilled about micromananging every meal down to the last teaspoon of paprika needed. We figured out a template that works for us & helps the kids know what to expect from our meals.

Kids (& adults) thrive on routine. Figure out a structure & plan for your meals that works for you so that come dinner time, you’re not left scrambling throwing whatever mish mash of ingredients you can manage to scrape together. (Plus it will save you time & money!)

 

 

6. Aim for getting it done, not perfection.

Kids need to eat, & most of what they eat should be nutrient dense, whole foods. But don’t beat yourself up if your kids eat white flour now & then, or don’t develop a passion for kale & hummus.

Too often, when parents switch to a whole foods plant-based diet they are naturally gung-ho & want to eliminate every last grain of sugar from their child’s diet. While this may work for some, I think a more sustainable approach (based on my own experience), is focusing on the big picture–

• Are my kids eating fruits &/or vegetables with each meal?
• Am I exposing them to a few new foods, tastes or textures on a regular basis?
• Am I maintaining my cool when confronted with picky behavior? (My kids can always make themselves a PB&J sandwich if they don’t like what’s being served, which has only happened on a few occasions.)
• Are my kids getting a variety of whole foods, every day?

 

Bottom line, fellow parents–it’s natural for kid’s to be picky.

Being able to try & enjoy new foods (especially healthy ones) is a learned behavior. Never force, demand, or threaten (you’re going to eat that %!**@! cauliflower, or else!!).

Even adults have likes & dislikes. I’m so glad I’m dairy-free, because it makes it even easier for me to avoid blue cheese. I hate, I mean, haaaate bleu cheese in any form or fashion.

Approaching food with a healthy, non-judgmental attitude is the best way to help kids want to try new foods & learn how to nourish their bodies in a sustainable, balanced, & healthy way.

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Can you relate or do you have anything to do add? Please do share your most frustrating/joyous/or “aha” moments with feeding kids. I’d love to hear & know I’m not alone!

 

→ Recipes my kids love + the meal planning system we use to minimize tantrum throwing at the dinner table (all vegan + gluten-free), here.                 

 

Quick life update: We are finally fully unpacked & moved in (after 4 intense weeks of trying to juggle a totally new reality with unpacking madness). And, my kids will be starting school next week (we are soooo ready for this!).

It has been quite a wild ride these past 5 months, but now that we are entering a period of relative normalcy, I have high hopes for returning to more regular blogging.

I appreciate your patience with me (especially if you have sent me an email & I have not yet responded, I apologize!) & really look forward to coming back to the blog with greater intention so that I can connect with you on a more frequent basis.

As always, I’d love to connect with you on Facebook! xo

 

Other bring joy posts you might want to check out:

• carrot cake even your husband will love {RECIPE}
• roasted cauliflower & lentil salad {RECIPE}
• easy cauliflower & chickpea curry {RECIPE}
• 9 myths about plant-based diets
• vegan & Mormon: part 2