I had an art professor in college who taught that if a painting, or a piece of design, had an element in it that could be taken out of the piece & you did not miss it, or feel that the piece was lacking because of that particular omission, that element is unnecessary. It’s clutter. The piece is better, more beautiful without it.
We’ve been in Texas for almost 2 months now.
My days have been a whirl of errands, cleaning, unpacking. Organizing, shopping, making meals. Making sure my children are safe, loved, & cared for.
Which, on paper, sounds like a cinch.
When a 2 year old is included in that bunch, well, the task is somewhat more daunting. (She has locked me out of the house, painted herself & the walls with lipstick, filled my teapot with oatmeal, thrown things in the toilet, chewed up pages in books. If I didn’t know any better, I’d guess she was part chimpanzee.)
Amalia & Salem walking home from Amalia’s preschool.
Yes, that is an Alice & Wonderland dress on Salem, & yes, those are mascara smudges around her eyes.
What do I want to say?
What I want to say is that I’m in a period of my life where the rhythms are steady & predictable. I am consumed with home & family & some days I wonder if I will ever feel like I’ve “moved in.”
My life looks & feels so different from how it used to be, I have a feeling it’s going to take some time to adjust.
I think I used to be ambitious. But a cross country move, having Joseph join the military, & bearing the brunt of the responsibility for caring for a large home & family has caused me to shift my thinking in ways I didn’t think possible.
I sleep more. I spend more time reading to my kids, less time online (in fact, very little time online). I exercise in a totally new way.
My goals for each day tend to be rather simple: feed & clothe the children, tidy the house & work on projects that will help move the unpacking/home organization process along.
In the morning, I day dream that by dinnertime my home is sparkling, everything is in it’s place. That Joseph will come home to dinner on the table, place mats set, children seated, glowing with obedience. Reality, however, doesn’t quite fit this mold.
But. I do savor my domestic victories. No dishes in the sink? Success. Colorful & interesting (& healthy) lunches packed & stored in the fridge for school the next day. Yes, also a victory. Dinner from scratch, an excursion to the park with the kids–lovely accomplishments.
The hard part about all these victories, is that, well, if I’m allowed to be shallow here, few people notice or care, other than my kids & husband. Which has led me to conclude that being a homemaker/housewife/stay-at-home mom is one of the most selfless things a woman can do.
It’s hard.
It’s not easy to go day after day serving & loving with no recognition beyond your spouse & children. Life is often slow, predictable.
In that slowness, I realize the things that I had to take out of my life in order to make room for a bandaged scrape, a kiss on the cheek, folded clean towels, or bowls of home cooked soup, are things that in the end, were clutter anyway.
♥♥♥
I’m so happy you’re here! I’m happy I’m here. Hopefully we can meet in this space more often. I’m still on twitter, fb, & pinterest, so join me there, if you’d like.
Also, I think you should check out Meg’s awesome posts (that I so appreciate): “5 reasons your wife won’t have sex with you,” & “5 reasons you should have sex with your husband every day.” I know, sounds like a title to a Cosmo article, but trust me, important stuff for a stronger marriage.
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