I have in the past, responded to inquiries & reader’s questions as posts on the blog, such as this latest one from Carrie, about emotional spending.

I think I’d like to make it a more regular feature of the blog.

After all, if one person is asking the question, chances are others are wondering or dealing with the same thing.

I admit there’s nothing more annoying to me than a know-it-all. Believe me. I don’t set myself up as an expert on anything, expect maybe as an expert of changing diapers & asking questions & administering hugs & kisses, but I’m not the kind of authoritative voice where you say, “I believe *everything* she says.” (That would be a little creepy, if you ask me.)

Because if I do know one thing, there’s very little of expert opinion that applies to everyone, particularly as it applies to individuals, who are unique & have their own histories.

So with that, here’s a recent email from Rose. (Sorry Rose, it’s taken so long to respond!)

She writes,

Hello Janae!

I must admit I read a lot on the internet regarding health/health related issues, but never thought I would actually sit down and ask a question about it!? But you seem to be on the money with how to stay slim/healthy, myths, etc.

I am 5’1″, 46 years old and have been active all my life. Eating vegetarian (with some fish),  AEROBICS, a runner, ELLIPTICAL… a poster child for health and fit. Then a year ago (to date) I had a bi-lateral bunion-ectomy. So I stopped running. However, I had been doing 30 minutes of core training the year prior and continued doing that now. At this time I started to get terrible pains with certain foods and after several doctors, I just changed my lifestyle to vegan.

I also began walking 2 miles a day and feel good but since changing my lifestyle to vegan 9 weeks ago, I have gained about 12 lbs!! I am figuring too much olives, oil, beans, NUTS!, but thought that I needed a protein with at least two meals. Hence the weight gain?? I don’t know and that is why I am writing you!

I feel terrible with all this weight!! I have worked so hard my whole life to stay fit and lean, but now I am unable to wear my clothes comfortably or at all!! It’s actually depressing. With my age and high fat, it’s not coming off in a week, if you know what I mean.

Is there anything you could suggest to get my slim figure back? I know this seems ‘trivial’ but at my age I want to continue to feel healthy and LOOK it too. One thing that I love is that my husband says I still look great to him.:) But honestly and frankly, my ‘mojo’ (if you know what I mean) has taken a walk because I feel very insecure in my skin suddenly!

My response

Rose,

Dearest, I understand the frustration.

12 pounds on a small frame is more than you’ve bargained for, I’m sure.

If I’m doing the math correctly, you gained 12 pounds in 9 weeks, which averages to a little over 1 pound a week. Every pound gained is an excess of 3500 calories, so let’s say you were eating 4,000 extra calories a week, more or less, which is a daily average of 600 extra calories a day which you ate but did not use/burn.

600 calories a day is like a serving of dessert & a handful of nuts. So, not too difficult to do this. So before you beat yourself up about it, realize how easy it is to gain weight (especially when you cut out a good chunk of activity) & it’s no moral failing on your part.

The good news, is that while not necessarily easy, losing that weight over a period of reasonable time is not rocket science.

If you had written me this email even a year ago, I think my response would have been different (maybe a lot) than it is now. I would have said, something like, cut out nuts, seeds, olives, & all high calorie foods.

Wahlaa! The weight will melt off.

I might have also said to track calories, & to weigh yourself every week.

[If you don't believe me, read this post I wrote over a year ago on how to lose the last 10 pounds.]

But time & experience has changed my perspective on weight, & in the wise words of the Ms. Ellen, “it’s about being healthy & happy,” not about achieving a particular size or weight.

[See this post for my definition of healthy.]

Before you go off & exclaim that I think that weight doesn’t matter at all, let me interject & say, weight does matter, to the extent that it affects your ability to move & be active & participate in day-to-day functions.

[Read this post, from the ladies at Beauty Redefined, who shed a different light on BMI, & why it's not necessarily representative of a woman's health.]

Beyond that, the numbers are rather arbitrary. There is a correlation (but not necessarily causation) between obese individuals & chronic disease, but I’d say it’s more a result of poor habits–sedentary lifestyle &/or diet is calorie rich & lacks essential nutrients.

You mentioned you were vegetarian prior to going vegan.

So I assume you cut out all animal foods–fish, cheese, milk, & other dairy products–which are all fairly calorie dense foods. If you replaced them with even more calorie-dense foods (which maybe you did as you suggest you’ve been eating more nuts & oil), this would, in part, explain the weight gain.

When many people switch from an omnivorous or semi-vegetarian or vegetarian diet to a vegan one, there’s a loss for some. That emotional connection to certain foods, cheese is a big one, &/or missing the “heavy” feeling you get after eating meat (fish in your case), makes it easy to over eat at first &/or eat too much of the tasty high-calorie dishes.

I know I went through a period where I over ate simply because I didn’t feel “full” enough.

Plant foods are lighter than animal foods, so you’re going to feel differently after eating. As long as you’re getting the proper nutrients & calories, this is nothing to be worried about. But it does take time to adjust.

You can read what I wrote about the secret to weight loss, but as I said, my perspective has changed a bit over time.

I believe strongly in mastering intuitive eating rather than following a prescriptive &/or restrictive diet plan. Don’t get me wrong, calorie counting & restriction does work, but for many people, it’s just not a long term solution.

I’m more interested in long-term solutions, rather than quick fixes.

If you’re committed to a vegan diet for life (which if you are, yay! good for you) & you want to maintain a healthy weight, here’s a list of a few main things to focus on.

A few tips for happy vegan eating

1) Respect your hunger.
Try to pay attention to hunger/satiation cues & eat regular consistent meals. Meal skipping is a pretty horrible way for most people to cut calories. I wouldn’t recommend it.

2) Eat lots of vegetables.
(& some fruits too.)
These are your best friends. You really want to hit it off with the green leafies & cruciferous ones.

When trying to lose weight, be very generous with vegetables. Salads & soups are great way to eat vegetables. Check out my slim + slender, salad, soups, & raw pinterest boards for inspiration.

3) Eat plenty of unrefined starch,
Like: potatoes, sweet potatoes, squash, corn, rice, legumes (lentils, peas, pinto beans, white beans, etc.), oatmeal, millet, even whole grain pasta. The list goes on. Starch will fill you up & give you the energy you need. I’ve found it also helps to curb sugar cravings. It’s when my diet lacks starch, that sugar cravings are the worst.

4) Go easy on all the other stuff.
Desserts (be they “healthy” or not) are still indulgences & shouldn’t be your main fare, & oils, nuts/seeds, & other high fat plant foods should be eaten as condiments (meaning judiciously). I don’t think it’s necessary to cut out fats (see, Is Dr. McDougall, right?), but if you’re finding it difficult to lose the weight you’ve gained, you may want to consider it for a time.

Though I must say, if a teaspoon of oil on roasted veggies is going to get you to eat 3 c. of veggies, or a teaspoon or two on raw salad is going to get you excited about eating a huge bowlful of spinach & green leaf lettuce, I say, go for it. It’s about the overall calorie density of your food, & a little oil on a bounty of veggies balances out.

5) Enjoy your food!
Savor it. Make time to eat, & avoid eating on the run.

Regular, consistent meals at the same time every day establishes a healthy ritual & pattern for balanced eating.

Also, know that when you’re eating plant-foods, you’re nourishing your body & eating in a compassionate, mindful way. I think that’s something to celebrate, for sure.

Best of luck,

♥♥♥

I hope if you have anything to add to what I’ve said, please do.
I love the idea of learning from each other, which is the best kind of learning.

Also, if you have a question or inquiry for me (doesn’t have to be about food! anything is on the table) that you’d like featured in this series, don’t be shy, & send me note, will ya?
Put “Reader’s Inquiry” in the subject line, please & I’ll do my best to respond in a timely manner. 

The post reader’s questions: gaining weight as a vegan appeared first on Bring Joy.

I live in a subdivision on the outskirts of San Antonio.

Up the road & down aways, is the elementary school where 3 of my kids attend.

It’s only about 1/2 mile away.

The walk there is all sidewalk & once we get out of our subdivision, the road is surrounded by trees & wildflowers. Not the pine trees of the Pacific Northwest, or oaks of the Wasatch Front, of which I’m accustomed, but shorter, more sprawling, bush-like trees & shrubs.

I do the walk twice a day–to take Amalia, my four year old, to preschool at 7:30 each morning, then again to pick her up at 10:30.

I push a double stroller. The girls look at books & I listen to podcasts. It’s a time for me to exercise, to get fresh air, to listen to something entertaining/informative/interesting.

Salem likes getting out of the stroller & runs along side me, or in front, & often doddles along the way.

She picks wildflowers, throws rocks, picks up sticks.

The post morning walks + how to beat the lonely bug appeared first on Bring Joy.

a few notes from me
Thank you for your comments on Friday’s post about frugal beauty.
Lots of great insights, thank you!

I’m sorry if I don’t always respond to each comment, but know that I read every word & appreciate what you have to share. I wish I had more time to devote to responding more thoroughly to each comment on the blog, but the reality is, I’m a wife & mom first, & whatever time I have left over is spent doing things like blogging. So thanks for understanding & know that I LOVE it when you comment & please continue to share, it makes what I do worth it.

Also, I want to make sure we’re clear on the fact that I am not against makeup.

For me, though, I realized it was an expense that I could do without for now so we can get out debt even sooner, & that surprisingly, my skin has really thrived on a mostly naked face. Also, I realized I didn’t need to buy more lipstick & more eye shadow colors when I already had plenty in my makeup bag. I’m still a red-lip stick devotee (especially for going out) & my short, light-colored lashes do benefit from some mascara love.

I really appreciate the makeup artist Bobbi Brown’s philosophy, which is, when wearing makeup, it should look like you’re not wearing makeup. Makeup should enhance, not detract. Each woman has a natural, unique intrinsic beauty–let’s let it shine.

the links

health
two views on Angelina’s double mastectomy

 listen
NPR’s Fresh Air, “Zoobiquity: What humans can learn from animal illnesses”
A fascinating look at the connection between human & animal health.

home
bring more peace of mind with 10 simple habits
& 6 tips for photographing your child

follow
MJ has a regular series on her blog, Pars Caeli called, Celebrate the Normal.
Each Wednesday she features ordinary pics from readers that
celebrate the beauty of every day, normal.
Follow, for some ordinary inspiration!

frugal
25 free instant mood boosters 

 watch
Cadry & I were having a conversation on twitter last week about how British tv shows are generally superior to American ones, at least when it comes to subtle nuance, wit, & charm. I’m not a connoisseur of British television, but I have watched a few BBC series that have been superb (I’m not referring to Downtown Abbey, just in case you’re wondering). Sherlock & Tess of the Durbervilles are two that come to mind.  Cadry recommended Gavin & Stacey, but I haven’t watched it yet.

Recently, I was introduced to Call the Midwife by my friend Adina (Season 1 is available on instant queue on Netflix).

I’ve only watched the first 5 episodes of season 1, but every episode has made me cry. The series opens up a world of birthing & midwifery care that makes me honored to be a woman. Touching & heartfelt (without being hokey), I highly recommend it. It will make you appreciate how natural birthing can be, but also the advances in medical care that make it so very few women nowadays actually lose their lives due to pregnancy & childbirth.

to pin
all recipes are vegan + gluten-free 

spring salad
& spring vegetable tacos

french lentil & vegetable salad
creamy leek & almond pasta

strawberry basalmic black pepper jam
sunflower seed butter
cinnamon swirl bread

spring roll in a bowl
new world szekely goulash

easy triple peanut butter swirl cheescake
smooth mocha chia pudding 

Happy Monday ya’ll.

Thanks for coming to bring joy today!
Did you know I’m also on twitter, pinterest, & facebook?
Have a question for me, or just want to say hello,
send me an email.

The post {MM} 5.20.2013 appeared first on Bring Joy.

Image from Flickr.

When you create a budget, with the intent to get out debt, & you’re really getting ambitious & lofty, you can seem a little crazy to others.

But what people may not understand, is the intense desire you have to get out from under the weight of oppression (you know, that debt).

So you get hard core, &  you’re willing to do crazy things like, GO WITHOUT. 

It’s a concept to which a good majority of middle to upper class Americans are foreign. This idea that you’d give up something now so that you can have something better later. What an idea, I know.

I’ve been going without a few things, giving up even more as we go along this get-out of debt journey (I’m that motivated, I guess you could say).

So I made a little list.

Here’tis,

5 ways to save (& go natural) on beauty

or in other words,

5 ways to be lazy,
save money,
help out the environment
& let your natural beauty shine

I’m going without:

1) salon shampoo & conditioner & extra hair stuff
Currently, I’m trying the no-shampoo route. We’ll see if that works & how long it will last. I’m pretty sure this qualifies me as a dirty hippie.

The post cleaning up my beauty routine & saving money while I’m at it appeared first on Bring Joy.

When you’re a mom, particularly of the stay-at-home variety, you appreciate appreciation. I mean you really appreciate it. Which is what Mother’s Day is all about. A day dedicated to you. It’s pretty great.

One of the best parts is all the hand crafted goodies.

Coupon books, art work, homemade tissue paper flowers.

& funny little things like this.
(from my kindergartener, Asher)

What I want to know, is why in the world would they put weight in there?
Is that some sort of sick joke?

(I thought it was hilarious, albeit strange.)

I especially enjoyed the part where my job is to: “take care when [Salem] cries.”
I love seeing the world from a 6 year old’s point of view.

The next best thing about Mother’s day is the breakfast.
Joseph made me savory crepes & lightly sauteed vegetables.

Which, on that note, I’m tired of sickenly sweet things for breakfast.

I’ve always been sensitive to sugar, & even have to be careful with my fruit intake.
In short, sugar (even the unrefined stuff) if not checked, makes me a little wacky.

So when Joseph asked me what I wanted for breakfast, what I really wanted, I told him I wanted savory crepes. No sugar in the batter, & I wanted to stuff them with sauteed vegetables & top with siracha sauce. He thinks I’m crazy.

But he made them for me.

These crepes are hands down my favorite, easy breakfast thing to make.

Traditional crepes are typically made of assortment of ingredients that make my stomach churn just thinking about them–eggs, flour, butter, & sugar.

This recipe uses none of that, & the result is a soft (yet durable), satisfying crepe. Gluten-free, dairy-free, & vegan.

The best kind of stuff.

I love that they don’t weigh you down & you can stuff them with any manner of sauteed vegetables or top with avocado & tomato slices.

Joseph sauteed yellow summer squash, onions, & mushrooms.
(All foods that he wouldn’t touch, but I love.)

If you must have sweet crepes, I don’t think it’s necessary to add sugar to the batter–just top with fruit &/or maple syrup. Plenty of sweetness there.

I first discovered how delicious vegan crepes could be from Neva & Jim Brackett’s Seven Secrets cookbook. It’s not a bestseller & it’s certainly not coffee book table material, but the recipes are straight foward, rather simple to execute, & satisfying.

This recipe is an adaptation of that in Seven Secrets. The original calls for half brown rice flour (which you can make on your own if you have a blendtec or vitamix, or wheat grinder) & half dry oats (finely blended), which works beautifully, but I like to use my all-purpose gluten-free flour blend.

I make a big batch (about 16 cups) & store it in a gallon glass jar in the pantry. Usually, you’d want to refrigerate gluten-free flours to keep them fresh, but I go through it quickly enough it’s not an issue.

Taking a tip from Shauna (ie. the “gluten-free girl”), I use her 40/60 ratio (40% whole grains & 60% white flour/starches).

I’ve played around with various combos & I really like a mix of mostly brown rice, with a little soy, & teff flours for my whole grain & white rice & potato or tapioca starch for my white flours.

This recipe calls for raw cashews. If you’re on a tight food budget (as we are), raw cashews are such a luxury.

Buying them in bulk & unsalted, raw, & in pieces (rather than whole, which can be nearly twice the price) can save you some money. Raw cashews are worth the purchase if nothing more than to use them for making amazing eggless crepes.

If you’re in a bind & don’t have raw cashews, tofu will also work. Just replace the cashews with same amount of tofu. I still prefer the cashews.

The post savory crepes + apparently I weigh 39 lbs. appeared first on Bring Joy.

So many links, so little time.
Here are a few of my faves of late.

money matters
♥ ”Money brings about good consequences —
helps us live valuable lives —
only when joined with ‘virtues.’
Virtues are good abilities
of mind and character.”

John Armstrong, as quoted in
How to Worry Less About Money

health
♥ don’t eat too much nutmeg!
♥ DIY natural coconut oil “hair repair” treatment 

kids
♥ the best illustrated children’s picture books of 2012

to read
♥ I’ve been a fan of the talented Connie Britton
since her work in “Friday Night Lights,” &
this made me want to check out
her new gig on “Nashville.”

reader love
♥ Ashlee, a beautiful expectant mother
& reader of bring joy, shares
some thoughts on preganancy & eating vegan.
Show her some love &
leave a supportive comment on her blog.

to pin
(all recipes vegan + gluten-free-able)

baked herbed + pistachio falafel
buffalo chickpea salad sandwiches

pineapple boozy baked oatmeal 

vegetable thai curry noodle soup
vegan jambalaya 

spicy sausage quinoa & polenta bake
simple asparagus soup
spring kale panzanella

oil-free raspberry salad dressing
kale, avocado + strawberry salad 

fudgy chocolate cake
rhubarb floats (use non-dairy ice cream)

Happy, happy Monday to you.

Thanks for coming to bring joy today!
Did you know I’m also on twitter, pinterest, & facebook?
Have a question for me, or just want to say hello,
send me an email.

The post {MM} 5.13.13 appeared first on Bring Joy.

I don’t consider myself an especially empathetic person.

Having lived a relatively pampered & spoiled life (as 99% of most Americans have, compared to a good majority of the world’s population) I know very little of true hardship, pain, or deprivation. So empathy, or the ability to be sensitive & aware of the feelings & experiences of others is something that does not come natural. I’m working on it.

Melanie, a bring joy reader, left the following comment on the this post.

I delivered a full-term stillborn baby last night and right now I’m appreciating this post. The reality of coming into and out of this world bringing nothing and taking nothing with us…. Yes, there really is little in this world that we “need.”

We can be content with less. It is the people, not the things, that are important…

I found it first thing this morning in my inbox. I wish I could’ve reached through my computer screen & given Melanie a hug.

Having brought 4 children into the world, I know what an emotional roller coaster creating life can be. I find it difficult to fathom the anguish of a mother who has lost a child.

Joy recently shared in her post The everyday is sacred, an eye opening video by David Foster Wallace entitled “This is Water.”  It helped remind me, that I have a choice to be conscious, aware. To realize everyone is struggling with something.

I noticed a few friends on fb share this post on depression today. It’s important for me to read this kind of stuff, because you see, I’m one of those annoying optimistic, just-be-happy! types who have a hard time understanding the complexities & burden of depression.

The point is, in sharing all this with is you, is that some days I’m overwhelmed by the hardness of life.

Why do babies die? Why must mothers have to go through so much turmoil & strife? Why do people struggle with depression for years, perhaps their whole life? The list of hard/sad/painful things goes on & on.

I’m not sure I’ll ever completely understand the point of senseless suffering & pain.

Regardless, I don’t think that’s the point.
I think what’s important is to focus on what I know, rather than what I don’t know.

What I know, is that in my efforts to be understanding & sensitive to the needs & feelings of others, to reach out & be aware, I experience greater empathy.

As a result, I have an increase of peace in my life, which makes this burden easier to bear.

The post Matters of Life, Matters of Death appeared first on Bring Joy.

I’ve never participated in CSA (community supported agriculture), but for years have wanted to. It just never worked out. But finally it has!

Last week I received our first box.

I was impressed with the variety–about 12 different items, local & organic. Alice Waters would be proud.

Made my hippie heart happy to see all those greens.

So this particular company, Greenling, is a bit more than a CSA. You can order more than just the local box, you can order organic groceries & have them delivered.

I’m just interested in the weekly box, so that is what I signed up for. I know other CSA’s require you to “join” before the growing season. Not this one–you can start & stop your orders at any time. You can have a box delivered to your doorstep twice a week. I don’t think I’ll be doing the twice a week delivery. The amount of produce we get in the box seems to be about right for our family of six.

The cost is $35 per week. So, $140 a month for mostly all the organic produce we need (we still need a few things like apples & other produce items not included in the bunch) is a pretty good deal. Our food budget is $425, so we still have lots left over for bulkier foods & pantry items.

Here are some things that I’m liking so far:

1. 1. Variety.
   I get a dozen or so different organic fruits or vegetables. I love the variety, & the fact that I get to try things like purple (!) carrots & kohlrabi, & other somewhat obscure items that you are not going to find at most supermarkets. I like that each week I get a different batch of items. This week I’m getting: grapefruit, avocados, beets & beet greens, strawberries, mixed summer squash, & other things that I didn’t get last week.
3. 2. Affordable.
   I have to be honest. On our tight food budget, we can’t afford many organic foods. This option makes eating organic a lot easier & more affordable.
5. 3. Arugala.
   Can you believe I’ve never actually bought arugala before? Which means, I’ve never prepared arugala. Until this week, when I got a bunch in the box. I made an argugla & romaine asian salad, served with California rice, & my kids (& Joseph) really liked it. Hyrum said: “Mom, I can’t believe you prepared this in a way that I actually like!” I took that as a compliment.
7. 4. Supports local farming.
   Less energy is used to transport=better for environment & we get fresh, nutritious foods–a win-win.
9. 5. They deliver!
   That right there is worth about $5 or $6 to me since it costs me that to go to Whole Foods or Costco.

For us, it seems like a no-brainer to use this CSA.

However, I could see if you were a picky eater (or had a lot of picky eaters in your family), &/or it’s just you (unless you’re on a raw foods diet), it might be hard to eat everything you’re given in a weeks time.

Another thing that I like about this CSA is they include a week’s worth of recipes to go with your box. One of the recipes was for roasted carrots & kale pesto. My kids ended up liking the roast carrots better without the pesto.

Prior to this, I had never just “roasted carrots.” I discovered, it’s sooo simple, & roasting really brings out the sugars so you get an almost sweet potato-like flavor.

♥♥♥

Have you ever been a part of a CSA? What was your experience like?

The post roasted carrots + why I love my CSA appeared first on Bring Joy.

Note: These shoes are my new faves. Vegan J-41 “barefoot” shoes, $30 from Costco. Sooo comfy.

Last week, after the post, Out of Debt: 5 steps, a reader Carrie (who btw, makes & sells these awesome totes), sent me this email in response to my response to her original comment on the post:

 I appreciate you mentioning that budgeting is a lot like weight loss. I have been the heaviest I’ve ever been ever since having my first child (currently 27 weeks with #2) and I think a large contributing factor IS being in school, having the uncertainty (husband graduates tomorrow and we have no idea what’s going to happen), and feeling out of control. I was praying for years for comfort, and then recently started changing my prayers to solutions.

The first thing was to get out of debt. We have a hefty goal of getting out of credit card debt by the time the baby gets here and I really am surprised at how quickly it’s moving!

And yes, food has been a huge money sucker. We were grocery shopping all the time (Costco can kill us), AND eating out. In the two weeks that I have actually made (and stuck to) a meal plan, we have come under budget and cut our expenses like crazy! We are always good at finding deals, but we are learning that while trying to get out of debt, it’s not about how much you SAVE necessarily, but how much you SPEND.

I’ve also found that I’m a totally emotional spender. Do you do this? Like, I really REALLY wanted to buy a scarf today because these last few weeks of my husband in school has been stressful. How do you manage to keep self control? I’m also an emotional eater, so any tips would be helpful

In a follow up email she writes:

I never knew just how much of an emotional buyer I was until I stuck to a strict budget. I found that I used ALL the same rationalizations as I do with food. “I deserve this, I’ve had a rough week.” “I deserve this, I had a good week!”

It’s pretty unhealthy, but if I could I would mourn with cake and celebrate with cake. Mourn with shoes and celebrate with shoes.
Self-control is not fun, but it feels so much better when I see that debt going down!

Response

Carrie,

First of all, congrats on your 2nd!

What an exciting time for your family. Especially your husband graduating. A milestone for both of you guys.

I know it’s a scary, unpredictable world out there, post-college. While in school, you’re able to comfortably live in a bubble of denial. It’s cozy & you don’t have to worry about the “real world” yet–or at least it’s easy to feel that way.

After Joseph finished his B.A., we had no future employment prospects.

Just a month before graduating, a career path that he had been planning on entering completely fell through. That was a huge disappointment. So we took a year off, lived with my parents, & saved a lot of money. Fortunately, we had no student debt, in fact, we were totally debt-free.

At that time we had 2 kids & one on the way.

It was humbling to be put back in that position of living with parents, but it was also a blessing. Not just monetarily, but we were able to spend quality time with extended family & get to know them better.

During that year, Joseph studied for the LSAT & applied to law schools. Then we waited. He was accepted to the school of his choice, & we spent the next 3 years after that working very hard.

Those were the years of babies & sacrifice. And when it was all over, we had a job lined up, but it required that Joseph pass the bar before he could begin. That was 6 more months, followed by 9 more months (because Joseph didn’t pass the bar exam the first time around & they only administer the test twice a year).

A lot of waiting & more debt. It was an uneasy period of our lives. It was also one of the most blessed. Joseph was a stay-at-home dad & the kids got to spend so much time with him.

April 2011, $110K in debt

This morning I read the following scripture in the New Testament.

“But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we carry nothing out. And having food & raiment let us be therewith content.”
1 Timothy 6: 6-8, KJV

In the moment of reading I was struck with how true these words are. The solution to controlling appetites, be they for food or material things, is contentment. And realizing, material things are temporary parts of our much greater existence.

As I discussed on Friday, money is as only as good as we allow it to be. It’s tool to help us live (that food & raiment bit), to be self-sufficient so then we can help others.

I could give you a list of “tips for not emotional eating” or “tips for not emotional spending.” But what it comes down to, is not a list of do’s & don’ts (although that may be helpful) but rather a principle: contentment. Which means, to be grateful for what we do have, to focus on that. To look around & notice the beautiful, the good, the kind. And acknowledge that what we have is “good enough.”

This mindset runs contrary to the thinking that pop culture sells which is: you are not enough. Therefore, you must buy what you do not truly need, you must eat when you are not hungry, because in doing so (they want you to believe), you may be made complete. The good news is, this only works if you buy into the idea that you aren’t “enough” & that what you have is not enough.

The beautiful thing about contentment is that it eases these feelings. It softens the edges of want, & helps us to focus on what is most important–not the things, but the people.

♥♥♥

Do you have anything to add?
Please share your experience or tips with Carrie.

The post a reader’s question: emotional spending appeared first on Bring Joy.

 

are good.

Because in the act of growing things, you learn.

We planted our garden several weeks ago.

Mostly tomato plants–cherry, heirloom (those always freak Joseph out & he swears he won’t eat tomatoes that look like “that”), grape, & a few others. I think about 7 or 8 in total.

Also some herbs–cilantro, basil, & parsley–predictable stuff.

Cucumbers, squash, & a pea plant from Amalia’s preschool & a bean plant from Asher’s kindergarten class.

Oh, & swiss chard.

I wanted more greens, but the truth is, I’m scared to grow anything that might wilt in the hot Texan sun. And not being a native, I really have no idea what’s going to make it & what won’t. I figured if they sell the plants at Lowe’s it’s probably okay. They didn’t sell chard as plants, just seeds, but chard is known to be fairly heat resistant, & it’s a rather mild green (not like those mustard greens), so I went with it.

We planted our garden in rubber maid containers, with holes drilled in the bottom for the water to drain.

Since we’re renting & because there’s no space among the parched patches of quasi-grass, I didn’t think we’d be able to plant a garden. At least more than a pot or two.

Then I got some inspiration from Adina, & realized–seriously, how modern have I become when I think I can’t grow a garden because I don’t have half an acre of earth to plow my field? It doesn’t have to be huge, & it doesn’t have to be complicated.

The swiss chard only came in seeds. I say that, because I prefer starter plants purchased at the store, not seeds. I can’t explain why, but I just get very nervous at the thought of having that kind of responsibility -of having to bring up a plant from a seed.

{And it might have something to do with the fact that I tried starter plants a few years back in Utah & nothing grew. Obviously, I did something wrong.}

I planted the chard. I threw down something like 30 seeds in several different containers.  Overkill, but I wanted to cover my bases.

And then I waited.

The seed packet said 7 days. 7 days. On the seventh day, I peaked into my little boxes.

Nothing.

The 8th, then 9th, then 10th day rolled around. Still no hint of life underneath the soil.

How could it be that out of 30 seeds I planted, not one, ONE, would survive?

But I continued to water the soil where they lay. Couldn’t hurt.

2 weeks rolled by.

On the 15th day, I noticed these two, almost insignificant sprouts.

Tender & vibrant.

The post Little Sprout appeared first on Bring Joy.