josephs student of the month

What does soulmate mean anyway?

As in, that’s my soulmate, or you’re my soulmate, or I haven’t found my soulmate yet.

I’ve often heard that it’s one of those things that can only really be felt & not described.

But I disagree.

Let me explain.

It’s common knowledge that Joseph & I are soulmates.

I know, quite a statement.

The thing is, I don’t believe in “the one.” As in, there is this “one” person for everyone.

Except when it comes to me & Joseph. We are meant for each other. I’m confident of that.

Like knowing gravity, sunshine, & breath exist. I know we are supposed to be together.

So when the other day a facebook friend, Irma, sent sent me this photo, telling me that I might know someone in the picture, & realizing that someone was Joseph (the cute one in the second row, second one over on the left side in the blue/white/red jacket), I took it as yet another sign that we are meant for each other.

(Not that I’m the sign-seeking kinda person, but I can’t help but acknowledge serendipity when I see it.)

This photo was taken in Dos Palos, California somewhere around 1990. Joseph lived there for just one year.

My friend Irma who also only lived in Dos Palos for a short time & who I went to high school with in Washington state, is standing behind him, with the white sweater with the cat on it.

When I told Joseph about the photo, he couldn’t believe it.

Was it a class picture??

No, Irma was in my grade & I am two years younger than Joseph.

The answer is found on the very bottom of the photo. You can make out a few of the top parts of the words that indicate the photo was a student of the month photo.

What are the chances that my friend from high school went to school with Joseph in Dos Palos, California, was the student of the month the same month that he was, & still had the photo??

The other day Joseph sent me this email.

As you know, we’re apart for the summer as he finishes up in Texas then heads off to Okinawa while we romp around Washington state visiting family & friends. This time it’s not a military forced separation–we figured it was a small sacrifice on our part so that our kids could spend time with our family & friends here–but that doesn’t make it any easier.

It sucks being apart.

I am all for being a strong independent woman. But at the end of the day, I am better with my husband than without. Two is better than one. (Hey, someone should write a song about that.)

Back to that email. 

He writes:

First, I’m sorry if you called last night.  I only noticed this morning that my phone was totally out of money*, so I reloaded it and should be always available.
This morning, when I awoke, I felt your absence.  I mean, I always feel your absence, and miss being beside you.  But this morning, it really just lingered with me throughout getting ready and driving to work, and now sitting here.
I miss your smile and your face and your pretty pretty body.  I miss holding you and being next to you, laying beside you at night.
As is always true when we are apart, I feel the reality of how unfair it is that you have all the kids and I’m just out here.  I hope you know how much I appreciate it, you having the kids.  I know you love them and show that love, and I’m thrilled to think that it is you taking care of them and not anyone else.  I miss them too, a lot.
*Yes, we are still using trashy pre-paid flip phones. Go ahead, laugh at us.

I should say, out of the two of us, Joseph is the romantic.

But that isn’t entirely fair. I have my moments.

I like moonlit walks holding hands, roses “just because,” mushy love notes written on scraps of paper left on pillows, a good chivalrous pulling out of the chair as much as the next girl.

More often than not though, instead of a romantic gestures or passionate yearnings, I just want to be with him. The simplicity of this urge is so pure & calm, it gives me peace. And fortunately for me, he feels the same.

So then, back to the original question: what is a soulmate?


It’s someone who you just want to be with all the time, no matter what, & they feel the same.

What do you think? What makes a person a soulmate?


  1. Michelle
    on September 21, 2015 at 11:05 pm said:

    love this. I believe I am married to my soulmate as well. It’s as if we knew each other long before we met. We were just meant to find one another.

  2. April
    on June 25, 2015 at 10:01 am said:

    That is so cool! And by the way-you probably know this but he is the identical twin of your dark haired son!

  3. Melissa
    on June 23, 2015 at 2:37 pm said:

    Mmmm… so sweet… <3

  4. Katie
    on June 22, 2015 at 12:58 am said: