The other half of this blog

joseph & me

 

There is another half to this blog that I don’t talk about much.

You always hear my voice, read my thoughts.

But just as important to bring joy is the voice you never hear–Joseph’s.

Joseph & I are going on ten, ten years this summer. If you think we look young for being married ten years, you are right.

We got married young, we started having kids young. So yes, we are still rather young for having five children & ten years of marriage.

Many people ask, how do you do it all?

I will tell you.

I don’t text (I don’t even have a smart phone). If people want to talk to me, they call or email, or hey! talk to me in person (I know, I’m living in the stone age).

My kids do chores & they clean as much as I do. In fact, hopefully more. So I spend very little of my days cleaning.

I often multi-task with exercise & housecleaning. For example, I like to take the kids for a walk while I listen to a podcast or audible book {I like audible.com for this (affiliate link)}, or we go to our community swimming pool & I exercise there. When I’m cleaning, I nearly always listen to something, so I make sure my brain is getting properly fed.

I only go grocery shopping a few times a month.

I minimize my errands (ie. driving around) to just once a week, if that.

Though I’m not perfect at planning my days, I do aim to keep a daily & weekly schedule {Amy Andrew’s explains more about this important habit in her ebook, Tell Your Time (affiliate link)}.

I lead a rather repetitious, predictable life. This, in part, enables me to get done those things that matter most to me.

I severely limit my obligations to only essential things (church, a few kid’s activities) which frees up my days to work, as well as care for my kids.

You see part of that work, which is this blog. But I also freelance edit, in addition to working on several side projects for bring joy (which, I’ve learned I shouldn’t really talk about until they’re ready to share!–I’ve learned the hard way).

So yes, I do a lot, but I’m focused. I try to be smart about the things I sign up to do & how I allocate my time.

Joseph & I, over the course of our marriage have often had many heart-to-heart discussions.

You know, the ones that are hard to have because both parties have things that they want to say & it’s not always easy.

The advantage of being married to an attorney, particularly one who doesn’t yell & takes a great deal of pride in maintaining civility, is that Joseph knows how to have discussions, not fights.

We negotiate, we discuss, we reach conclusions & compromises. Because of this, so far, there has never been anything so difficult that we couldn’t talk through it.

We had a discussion recently where we talked about all of various responsibilities–between his work, my work, our children, the home, church, & other obligations. On top of all this, we’re striving to become debt-free. We were reassessing our priorities, addressing concerns, making sure that the other one felt heard.

After an hour long, intense conversation, I said, “You know, it’s not easy being so freakin’ awesome.”

We both laughed.

It’s true. If you want to be spectacular (which, who doesn’t want to be spectacular?), you have to work hard.

You have to be focused.

If you want a spectacular marriage, you have to put time into it. You have to want it.

If you want a spectacular business, or family life, or what-have-you life, you have to work–not just work, but smart work.

How do you work smart? You educate yourself. You learn from those who have gone before & are doing what you want to do, or are what you want to become.

So back to the conversation that Joseph & I were having.

Joseph has always been super dad x 100. He his very hands on. He does the bed time routine. In fact, each day when he comes home from work, he takes over with the kids & I take a step back. He often makes meals, including lunches, breakfasts, & dinners (I told you he can cook).

He undoubtedly is the reason I am able to blog, that I’m able to do all of the things I mentioned before.

And though you may never read his words, or get to know him like you know me, realize that he is very much a part of bring joy as I am.

He is the other half of the this blog.

He is the other half of me.

Just thought you should know.

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Comments


  1. Laurie
    on May 29, 2014 at 5:18 pm said:

    Oh, what a lovely post and compliment to your husband!

    This really resonates with me: “I lead a rather repetitious, predictable life. This, in part, enables me to get done those things that matter most to me.” When I was much younger, I’m sure I thought that life needed to be filled with all sorts of exciting, novel experiences every day to be fulfilling, but it turns out that it’s when all the unnecessary stuff falls away that life really gets good.

  2. Bliss Doubt
    on May 29, 2014 at 2:32 pm said:

    Wow, your weight loss! Great going.

  3. April
    on May 29, 2014 at 1:08 pm said:

    Great post-can you pretty please w/ a cherry on top elaborate on kids helping around the house? I feel like I do about 2hrs of house work a day but w/in minutes of coming home the kids mess it up. I try so hard to have them do chores but what they do doesn’t make a dent. I struggle to let go of the “it’s easier if I do it myself…and I do a better job anyway.” What chores do you have them do and how can I get them to do them w/o micromanaging them both in getting them to *do* the stuff and in how they do it. Please help!!

    • Janae Wise
      on May 29, 2014 at 1:58 pm said:

      Post on kids + chores coming right up (within the next week or two)! :)

  4. Meredith @ Unexpectedly Magnificent
    on May 28, 2014 at 7:02 pm said:

    Such a lovely post, Janae! Joseph sounds amazing. :) I probably wouldn’t be blogging if it weren’t for Mark. Having a supportive, loving partner is the best blessing.

  5. Joya
    on May 28, 2014 at 5:41 pm said:

    Thank you both for being so awesome!!:0)

  6. Caroline @ Fighting For Wellness
    on May 28, 2014 at 5:13 pm said:

    Aww- this is lovely!

  7. Lisa C.
    on May 28, 2014 at 3:45 pm said:

    Janae, I adore you. We really should be next door neighbors. ;)

  8. Kerry @ Kerry Cooks
    on May 28, 2014 at 3:28 pm said:

    This is such a great, true post! My other half often says how proud he is of me for my blog and I’m grateful to have such a great other half behind me as well :)

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